whenever i think of performances and constructs. i think of the inward self that motivates that outward appearances. but to search deeper, i always find a stumbling block. to know any deeper is to only reduce the chaotic truth to some controlled system.
beyond being is perhaps more appropriate for discussion at this juncture.
to be more precise, beyond being is the projection of a being unto some future hope and desire of to be. with the passivity of the self (against the certainty of death) comes an active agency (from the inward self?) that transcends from (or desire to transcend from) facticity to infinity.
perhaps this premise allows me to continue the discussion of performances and the inward struggle. (which i left off some time ago) Perhaps it is not a struggle after all. Perhaps, it is a struggle for peace and stability. The outward appearances strive for a certain consistency, for example, for passivity to be stronger: by which I mean that the rejection of the possibility of sudden death is precisely the passivity against this violence to life. Life is assumed to last (at least for a certain period, enough to be have lived a life). Fecundity or Egocentricity is, perhaps, the first duty a person can have to oneself. After all, do we not care for ourselves first before we come to learn love? The human's desire is to survive first, feel later. Cry for food first, ask for attention next, and love the mother back later.
so beyond performances and constructs is to point to some innately selfish trait within us? but while the desire to live can be strong for most of us, the desire to die can be equally strong for others. After all, the earthquakes one can experience in life are too numerous for us to list down in full. one cannot, however, move away from that relation to death. The moment of being, i.e. to be born is to anticipate the moment of death. As we fill in the gap that comes in between life and death, it is almost inevitable that we perform, simply to stage our lives, as they progress in between life and death. we live in limbo. How insecure one can feel at this thought. Hence, future projections are ever so earnestly and diligently sought after, for better or worst. No matter how one can argue, rebuke or defend, beyond death remains unknown. And no living consciousness can prove to you what beyond life and death is.
beyond being is perhaps more appropriate for discussion at this juncture.
to be more precise, beyond being is the projection of a being unto some future hope and desire of to be. with the passivity of the self (against the certainty of death) comes an active agency (from the inward self?) that transcends from (or desire to transcend from) facticity to infinity.
perhaps this premise allows me to continue the discussion of performances and the inward struggle. (which i left off some time ago) Perhaps it is not a struggle after all. Perhaps, it is a struggle for peace and stability. The outward appearances strive for a certain consistency, for example, for passivity to be stronger: by which I mean that the rejection of the possibility of sudden death is precisely the passivity against this violence to life. Life is assumed to last (at least for a certain period, enough to be have lived a life). Fecundity or Egocentricity is, perhaps, the first duty a person can have to oneself. After all, do we not care for ourselves first before we come to learn love? The human's desire is to survive first, feel later. Cry for food first, ask for attention next, and love the mother back later.
so beyond performances and constructs is to point to some innately selfish trait within us? but while the desire to live can be strong for most of us, the desire to die can be equally strong for others. After all, the earthquakes one can experience in life are too numerous for us to list down in full. one cannot, however, move away from that relation to death. The moment of being, i.e. to be born is to anticipate the moment of death. As we fill in the gap that comes in between life and death, it is almost inevitable that we perform, simply to stage our lives, as they progress in between life and death. we live in limbo. How insecure one can feel at this thought. Hence, future projections are ever so earnestly and diligently sought after, for better or worst. No matter how one can argue, rebuke or defend, beyond death remains unknown. And no living consciousness can prove to you what beyond life and death is.
It is, always, a faith.
-- paulo grey
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as she leaves for the long awaited vacation,
leaving me a vacant gap to fill
another circle of that foolish wait in motion,
weaving in me a web of restless will
where did she run off to?
i can't get to her.
please tell her to look at me for once.
and not sing those songs she only hears.
will she face me one day.
will i face her one day.
get back soon. get back soon.
but i will be gone. I will return.
not me. him. you. thinking. of. him. Him. not me.
y
z
a
I. i. forget. miss. her.
- damien bau
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A-Z discourses...a lifetime work in progress? A.
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